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Post by duckyaisha on Mar 20, 2010 16:46:14 GMT -5
One of those ones where nobody laughs and they all stare at you and everything gets awkward? Or even just have a misunderstanding (a real kind of misunderstanding, not one of those INSERT NEEDLESS DRAMA HERE misunderstandings)? But that would mean the Clan isn't one big harmonious group. It would mean... a smidgen of minor conflict. -cue organpipes-
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Yes. ANYTHING other than a 'light-hearted joke at someone else's expense'. I've found 3 jokes in the past chapter from different cats that were exactly the same, humor wise, YES, Erin, I KNOW the cats are in a clan, but they wouldn't conform quite that much!
---x----
This makes me think that every cat in Thunderclan is a malfunctioning robot created by a scientist that graduated at the bottom of his class.
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Post by Cloud on Mar 20, 2010 21:00:47 GMT -5
...maybe they are. It would certainly explain the impossible battle sequences.
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Rolo
New Scribe
[M:0]
Resident chatter%\1\%
Posts: 18
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Post by Rolo on Mar 21, 2010 7:26:11 GMT -5
That might be what tvtropes would call a Broken Aesop, considering the way the Erins have been treating violence (Firepaw's desensitization in his first battle, for one example, and the way they praised his initial aggression at Graypaw).
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Yes... the Erins are fabulous at giving out contradictory messages, as you've already seen.
One of the best things about Bluestar's Prophecy is the more down-to-earth and grittiness of the fight scenes (emotion-wise, not anatomy-wise). That is one area I can label as supreme to the first series. The first series was fabulous in simply brushing over the impact a warrior's life has on a cat, this one is much better at explaining it (although, it's only partial).
Unfortunately, as I've found out, when writing anything other than a fight scene or something with high emotional impact, the Erins are unable to write with anything close to a dramatic, effective writing style. The quality is dipping again, and the chapters read like someone sticking to a strict script, like the characters /have/ to act this way for the story to move on. Seeing how the Erins revealed on their FAQ how they write the books together, it seems more or less accurate.
Although expertise isn't the same as experience, it seems like they've had enough time to improve their skills.
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Exactly why I used 'expertise'. Yes, they have a basic grasp of grammar, but they write like they've no idea how to create a complex sentence or a metaphor.
Sentence to lawl over of the day:
- in reference to collecting catmint, talking about how it should now be dry-
Featherwhisker glanced at the sky. "The dew should be burned off by now."
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Post by Cloud on Mar 21, 2010 8:29:39 GMT -5
There are tiny arsonist fairies in the forest who evaporate dew, Rolo, didn't you know? /joking
On another note, I should really write more of these considering how much discussion they formulate.
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Post by Ten on Mar 21, 2010 19:06:02 GMT -5
"Seeing how the Erins revealed on their FAQ how they write the books together,"
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How? /doesn't want to read their FAQ
Arsonist fairies sound awesome.
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Post by Cloud on Mar 21, 2010 20:30:27 GMT -5
"Arsonist fairies sound awesome."
They're the nature-y stealth ninjas of the forest, except they're pyros. They have no magical powers or anything, but they're good with fire. Sometimes they start forest fires on purpose for new growth. 'Cause occasional, natural forest fires are actually good, right?
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Post by Cloud on Mar 22, 2010 0:04:13 GMT -5
Chapter 7
““What’s happening?””
A lack of anything relevant.
Goosefeather reads a “sign” in the vole’s fur that apparently says that WindClan is going to crush ThunderClan in battle. Don’t even ask me how, because it makes as much sense as sparkly vampires.
So, cats debate about whether they should attack WindClan or not, if Goosefeather is right, bla bla bla. Then comes the really classic line of: ““If we can’t trust StarClan, then we are lost,” Dappletail muttered.””
No, if you realize you can’t trust StarClan you’re a lost cause.
““All must fight when we face this much danger!””
Especially the kits and new apprentices, yup yup.
“a sudden, painful understanding”
…of their haunting mortality. –waggles fingers-
“How could Pinestar refuse?”
He ALREADY has an all expenses paid vacation to the Bahamas, so of course he can refuse the trip to the five-star spa.
-cough-She’s wondering if Pinestar could refuse to fight WindClan. Frankly I think any leader with a half a brain could refuse instead of giving in to his blood-hungry warriors pressuring him. But no, Pinestar says they’ll attack at dawn. (why do they always attack at dawn?)
Peer pressure ftw.
“Featherwhisker brushed his tail along her spine.”
Super tails! Super tails! The body parts that really fail!
““You were born a warrior”
He must know of her genetic freakiness.
“mouse, newly caught and still soft and fragrant.”
Fragrant how? Of blood?
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Post by duckyaisha on Mar 22, 2010 6:53:36 GMT -5
"Arsonist fairies sound awesome."
Sound like something out of Artemis Fowl.
"Um, no. I think you want only the strong, experienced warriors and apprentices fighting. Not everyone."
Attack young kits! Go forth and fight even though your eyes haven't opened yet!
““You were born a warrior”
Wait, so she was born a young adult? *shudders with squick*
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Post by Cloud on Mar 22, 2010 12:05:40 GMT -5
"Sound like something out of Artemis Fowl."
Foolish human, Holly Short will vaporize you. /shot
"Attack young kits! Go forth and fight even though your eyes haven't opened yet!"
It's the Blind Brigade.
"Wait, so she was born a young adult? *shudders with squick*"
Practically. I mean look at how unrealistically fast she developed.
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Post by Ten on Mar 22, 2010 18:52:02 GMT -5
"'Cause occasional, natural forest fires are actually good, right?"
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mmhm. One reason people sometimes have controlled burns.
"If we can’t trust StarClan, then we are lost,"
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I vote for being lost. /fancy explanation
But for real. She's implying StarClan is their soure of guidance, which would so hold water if they did much guiding.
"Not everyone."
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Now that's where you're wrong, Cloud. At a time like this, everyone wants unborn kits fighting for them.
"But no, Pinestar says they’ll attack at dawn."
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Remind me why.
"Peer pressure really is a problem with kids today, isn’t it?"
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That's not so much peer pressure as it is "do what the people want or you won't be leader for long".
"Super tails! Super tails! The body parts that really fail!"
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Did you type that to the tune of Animail?
"You were born a warrior"
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Uh, no, whoever he's talking to was born a kit.
"That sentence makes me think of flowers, not prey."
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Meat can be soft and fragrant.
BBQ ads tend to avoid the specific adjective "fragrant", however.
Did you know that cigarettes were once considered feminine? /unrelated to topic
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