"Oh, so she doesn't lurk around someone else's conversation? She just picks a group, and if... say, Grimykit accosts her, she runs toward her selected group for protection?"
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Mmmm, yeah-- although if generally only one person or thing she'll try to fair on her own (even if it's a grasshopper--*can just imagine her getting startled by one and trying to track it down to kill it*). Bigger groups of things, whether it be other cats or during a hunt for rats-- she doesn't tend to fair well in those since there's so much going on. Overwhelming the senses almost, the more practice she gets though, the better I'll make her become. *wants a cat that'll grow rather than an already 'perfect' one. *throws up at the idea of a perfect character*
"I'm trying to figure how you'd role play her -- you see, with extroverts and aggressors and cats who go out to convert others and those sorts, it's easy to see how they'd play a part, but we don't want anyone to bother with the whole process on a cat who'll only sit in corners and never interact. I think you said Lividpelt was clingy, but right now she's not looking like the grabs-at-strangers-like-an-octopus kind of clingy, which would be pretty funny. Then again, that might be insulting. I like the snarky, sassy blind characters. With her cynicism, it'd be easy for her to be blunt and sarcastic, no?"
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Lol, she won't just sit in a corner, that's for sure. She'll venture out once she's sure she could handle it. Oh, yes-- she can indeed be very snarky and what not, it just takes a bit for that slightly more... aggressive tone of her personality to come out. xD The more comfortable she is with someone too? The more likely her bluntness will come out.
"I should go back over her history.
Looks like you're still putting spaces on only one side of the dash."
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Hot diggity-- *scrolls through and tries to fix 'em.*
"Now this makes less sense. You do know how to fix this, right?"
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*facepalm* Yeah, I do. xDD I just seem to, for some reason, keep doing all the wrong things to it. *scolds self*
"mm... Mindset doesn't seem like the right noun here. She heard his... views?
Also, note that hearing "of" something is different from hearing it."
--
*Changes to views*
"The syntax here is a bit confusing. That might just be a punctuation issue, though. Another note: when you're writing a sentence like this, whatever you put in the sentence first will happen first in the reader's mind, and whatever you put last happens last. Because of this, she doesn't seem very shocked, since she's getting over her shock before you even mention it exists."
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Alright, I moved it so that the shock came first.
Hopefully that'll clear things up.
"There's another comma splice in there, but ignore that for now -- even though she can't see, can't she still use other senses? Cats have sharper hearing and smell, plus they have whiskers sticking out of their face to feel around them. A lack of sight isn't going to make her helpless, in particular when it comes to things you can't see in the first place. I got the impression that this sentence is talking about her trusting her mother's views over her father's (even though her views section sounds more like her father's thinking) but views aren't something you need to rely on a seeing cat for."
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xD sTaRrrzies (lolwhat? the censors gotcha) comma splices~ Anyways, she can use her senses. Yet yer little mind wants to believe that everything is okay, that everything will turn out okay. Yet with the death of her parents, she was finally forced to notice that it was just as her father often spoke of. A ' to see with her own eyes' sort of experience.
"Why "though"?"
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xD Good point. *takes that out* I use it far too much!
You mean nothing he did could inspire her?
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Lawlz, yes. *changes*
"Based on later sentences, what you mean by strong is that he continued trying to make her move and trying to inspire her, and if that's the case, then no, he was not forced to continue that. He could have given up. What I'm unclear on is what changed for her to go from ignoring him to being inspired by him. Just... happened over time?"
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xD It's more of he felt responsible for her, so he really didn't want to give up hope on her. *Sees Lightfang as a very persistent and possibly annoying kind of guy.* Yes, it did gradually happen over time. She's not as strong willed as most, so she can be worn down eventually. Although later on in time, she did pick up some of his persistent traits. If Lightfang tried to get her to do something now the same way? It'd probably only happen out of respect for him, she's not likely to budge as quickly now. xD
"I know this is supposed to be the get-inspired sort of stuff, but it's vague. How was he her pillar of support (i.e. give an example of him supporting her)? What things did she want to change? How would she put in effort to achieve... er, what is she trying to achieve?"
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Attempted to fill that in a little more.
"What did she care for?"
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Lightfang, and her dreams.
Included that.
"What do you mean?"
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They would have had a fairly good family life if they were able to stay around. So, in turn, she wants to live her life and eventually reach that point where she too can have a family of her own. She also eventually, wants to turn into a person who can support others. Just like how Lightfang supported her, she wants to return the favor.
That would mean she had this behavior even during her time of mourning, no?
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*nodnod* That's why Lightfang kept having to tell her that even though that might normally be a good idea, not everyone will so easily risk their life for yours.
"Lightfang taught her when she was young-- for both the future and present, that even though she may be in a group-- there's no guarantee that her life would ever be fully secured in the paws of others."
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I'm not sure why you're using dashes here. Commas might be better, since the pair of dashes make it seem like you're doing a parenthesis-size interjection, but then the actual sentence doesn't flow like that's how it is. What you meant was something like this, no?
When she was young, Lightfang had taught her that she could not find absolute security in the paws of others.
"What ever happened to Lightfang, anyway. It's like he disappeared. Did she leave him after she received her warrior name? Do they still talk with one another? Is he a Clanner or a con? Were this and the "being strong" thing the only philosophy-type lessons that he imparted to her?"
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He's still around, however she's trying to fair on her own for the most part. Wants to really see if she can survive without him instead of having to rely on him all the time. Which is a perfect opportunity to start rping, she'd be getting out to meet other cats, to make other connects, all that sort of stuff. He never has really... 'left', he just kind of let her do her own thing, but still kept an eye on her just in case. He'd be a minion. *will put that in the kin section* And that was why way earlier on I questioned if you guys had like an 'adoptee' section, because he still comes in, but that'd mean a few posts of pretty much just me talking to myself. xDD He taught her a lot of things just through experiencing a good portion of his life with her. That's where the minion like view came from, some aspects of her personality, lots of things.
"Odds of what?"
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Odds of being betrayed. *added this*
She's not... overtly friendly since she's never quite sure whether it could lead to a confrontation and what not. It's just that she knows there are others around-- through scents and touch, and she tries to be near in case something comes along that could catch her by surprise.
Included.