The Bluestar Diaries

[Cloud]

Oh, I know, Rolo, I know. However, I refrained from ranting on it because it would mostly just be me frothing at the mouth at the Erins' stupidity, and that's neither intelligible nor enjoyable. Mmm...it's all just too fralking stupid to even bother trying to figure out. As to whether the rest of the book is better, the answer is yes, but only a little. There are some (very small) good bits. But then, I'm not much of a judge. You'll have to tell me.

[Rebecca]

I-I want to see either Ten or Cloud reveiw Firestar's quest. .3.

[Cloud]

xD K, that'll be next after Bluestar's Prophecy. See, Ten, there is an advantage to me owning them. /shot

[Ten]

"I-I want to see either Ten or Cloud reveiw Firestar's quest."
--
But by now it's so predictable what stuff the Erins will write. After supertails, I doubt they'll have any new ideas.


"See, Ten, there is an advantage to me owning them."
--
You can review it without owning it.

[Cloud]

Fair point. .3.

I'd do Firestar's Quest for the names alone, but we also get to see Sir Smudge in it, though only briefly.

[Cloud]

Chapter 3, Part 1

And it’s a little less than five moons later. Bluekit wakes up in the nursery, and we get an infodump on what’s happening in it.

Poppydawn (she whose name fails badly) has had three kits: Sweetkit, Rosekit, and Thistlekit (no relation to Thistle).

There’s something very wrong with this text. Namely the fact that the Erins wrote it but other things, too.

“Sweetkit, who was white with tortoiseshell patches, was named after Pinestar’s mother, Sweetbriar.”

The failness, it hurts.

Why in heaven’s name would you name a kit “Sweet”? They can’t look sweet. (Well, not in the tasting sense.) Did Sweetbriar come in assorted flavors like cherry and lemon?

And briar as a suffix is just no. Briar should be the cat’s prefix, not her suffix, assuming the cat was brown.

Rosekit is also fail. ‘Nuff said. Thistlekit is gray and white, but I don’t know exactly what thistles look like, so I can’t really pass judgment on him. Yet.

“The predawn sky stretched overhead, soft and gray as a dove’s wing. She recognized the scents of Sparrowpelt, Windflight, and Adderfang, still fresh in the air. They must have left on the dawn patrol.”

Wait…first it says it’s before dawn. Then it says the dawn patrol just left. What? As for Windflight, apparently he is transparent and of a flighty nature. =D

““I’ll take you, if you’d like,” the ThunderClan deputy offered.”

Bluekit was staring out into the forest wanting to go out, and she’s so special that Sunfall, (BOOM! And the sun crashed, incinerating the earth) like an idiot, offers to take her.

Without telling her mother where she is, knowing she’s less than six moons old. Gee. Oh, and anything could attack them.

And they go out there with lots of description.

Then Sunfall proves his idiocy beyond doubt when he jumps on a boulder and tells Bluekit to try it, too.

A kit. Jumping on a (and I quote the book here) “massive” boulder. And she could fall and get hurt. Cloud’s hoping that he just really hates Bluekit and isn’t like this normally.

Oh, and then he tells her to CLIMB an even bigger boulder.

And she proceeds to climb it, and “was level with the treetops surrounding the camp.”

I think that speaks for itself.

We get a “suddenly”, too.

They meet the dawn patrol, who say WindClan stole prey, and they all head back to camp. Oh, and Speckletail also had kits: Lionkit and Goldenkit. Forgot to say that earlier. Take two guesses as to who they are.

If you said soccer mom and Brambleclaw's mother, you would be right.

[Ten]

"I'd do Firestar's Quest for the names alone, but we also get to see Sir Smudge in it, though only briefly. "
--
What's this? Sir Smudge? In that case, it might be worth it.


"Bluekit wakes up in the nursery, and we get an infodump on what’s happening in it."
--
Describing what's happening in the current timeline isn't an infodump. However, it can be boring if... if it's not interesting.


"Poppydawn (she whose name fails badly) has had three kits: Sweetkit,"
--
Wait, what?


"Sweetkit, who was white with tortoiseshell patches,"
--
This made me laugh. It should be "tortoiseshell with white patches".


"was named after Pinestar’s mother, Sweetbriar."
--
Now envisioning Breyers ice cream.


"Did Sweetbriar’s mother lick her when she was born?"
--
Of course she did.
However, I've heard cats can't taste sweet things.


"Rosekit is also fail."
--
Rose in a warrior name always looks like it's either trying too hard to sound feminine or trying too hard to sound gothic.


"Thistlekit is gray and white, but I don’t know exactly what thistles look like,"
--
When I see thistle, this is what I think of.


"was level with the treetops surrounding the camp."
--
Join us next time for a new episode of Rocks on 'Roids.

[Cloud]

"What's this? Sir Smudge? In that case, it might be worth it."

Exactly.

"Now envisioning Breyers ice cream."

XDDDDD I love you, Ten.

"However, I've heard cats can't taste sweet things."

Oh wow. You're right, I just remembered that. So....uber fail.

"Rose in a warrior name always looks like it's either trying too hard to sound feminine or trying too hard to sound gothic."

Yeah, and besides the fact that when I think of roses they think of purple, white, or bright red. And says that Rosekit is "pinky-orange." e.e

"When I see thistle, this is what I think of."

Thistle fails too, then.

"Join us next time for a new episode of Rocks on 'Roids."

xD

[Cloud]

Chapter 3, Part 2

“yellow eyes burning in the predawn light”

Poor Sparrowpelt’s sizzling eyeballs. Annnnd it’s still before dawn. Though the dawn patrol has left. And patrolled. I really have nothing to say to that.

“Weedwhisker”

Weed is too vague to be a prefix. How would they know what weeds are, anyway? They don’t cultivate any particular type of plant, and unless I’m mistaken a weed is any type of plant that isn’t where it belongs.

“Larksong”

Cloud is mystified as to how a cat can look like or use their song, or have a song-y personality.

““You know you’re not supposed to leave the camp!””

Ah yes, assorted BlunderClan warriors and Bluekit got back to camp. Moonflower promptly appears and demands to know where Bluekit has been, stating this. I’m thinking Sunfall, as an experienced warrior, would know that kits aren’t supposed to leave camp. Maybe the Erins had him do this so he would look kind and sympathetic, but he comes across as irresponsible. Why should he break the rules for Bluekit, anyway? I guess she’s Just That Special.

“eyes round with worry”

The Erins have used this phrase a few times now, and the meaning is kind of lost in it. Cats’ eyes are already fairly round, so…they get perfectly circular when the cats are anxious? –snorts-

“fur ripple along her father’s spine”

Due to the fact that the moon’s usual rotation was out of whack, Stormtail’s spine fur’s tide patterns became random and unpredictable.

“Pinestar was beckoning them forward with his tail.”

Because butt-facing your Clan at a meeting is just such a good idea.

Oh, and Bluekit and Snowkit are now apprentices. Whoo.

[duckyaisha]

I haven't posted on this in such a long time! Anyways, I hate Bluekit. She is just. So. Special! Go die in a hole in a special way.