Pebbletail

[Ten]

huh. I would think that to be due to the way the light falls on hairs that are bent at different angles.


"plan an attack on them later."
--
Just for being a Clanner, not doing anything Clanny, yes? Why did he wait until later?

[Cloud]

"huh. I would think that to be due to the way the light falls on hairs that are bent at different angles."

-shrugs- You could be right. Do you want me to remove it from the description?

"Just for being a Clanner, not doing anything Clanny, yes? Why did he wait until later?"

Barkwhisker assumed that if he attacked them and injured them, he would prevent them from doing anything Clanny for a while, just in case they were planning something. And most of the time he waited until later (usually if there was more than one Clanner) so he could gather some con allies and plan how they were going to strike.

[Ten]

"Do you want me to remove it from the description?"
--
I'd prefer it, as my thinking is that cats don't have actual color variation like that unless they're pointed.


"attacked them and injured them"
--
Not intending to kill, just disable? mmkay.


"so he could gather some con allies and plan how they were going to strike."
--
Alright. Add that in, too.

[Cloud]

"I'd prefer it, as my thinking is that cats don't have actual color variation like that unless they're pointed."

Done. The sentence is gone from the description.

"Alright. Add that in, too."

Done.

Ahhhh I'm so glad I switched to making Pebbletail. This is so much easier.

[Ten]

"They felt they owed a debt for all she had given them," <-- no comma


"Unfortunately, as they were out hunting one day Thinfoot was ambushed"
--
Who ambushed her? Why?

[Cloud]

"<-- no comma"

Fixed.

"Who ambushed her? Why?"

I changed it so the history explains it.

[Ten]

"I changed it so the history explains it."
--
I wish you'd summarize these answers in your posts.


"Unfortunately, as they were out hunting one day Thinfoot was ambushed by hungry a hungry cat" <-- delete other hungry


"who wanted the lizard she'd started to eat.

She died."
--
Even though I know this has happened before, the way you've written it sounds comedic. I pictured her with this little lizard, then a cat who's foaming at the mouth jumps up and attacks her, and she falls over dead. With Grimykit, at least, he had some further motivation.

[Cloud]

"I wish you'd summarize these answers in your posts"

akthpth. Sorry. I forgot.

"<-- delete other hungry"

Done.

"Even though I know this has happened before, the way you've written it sounds comedic. I pictured her with this little lizard, then a cat who's foaming at the mouth jumps up and attacks her, and she falls over dead. With Grimykit, at least, he had some further motivation."

So...I should change the phrasing or what?

[Ten]

"So...I should change the phrasing or what?"
--
You should find some other way for her to die, because an emancipated cat would/could not kill for a lizard.

[Cloud]

Aha. -ponders- perhaps she died of illness?

Thank you Thistle for helping me think of that. :3