We need to talk.

[duckyaisha]

The black void expanded to include Drabheart, and she was now aware of the sand clinging to her fur, the small stones that had worked their way under her unsheathed claws and made her paws bleed. Above her, bats rustled their wings slightly, unconscious of the drama unfolding below them as they slept. Branches met overhead, intertwining and forming a pointed roof that blocked out the sun. Only a few enterprising rays found their way through the wood-and-stone maze, dimly illuminating the enclosure. This was the world as she saw it, and the only world she knew.

Her chest was heaving with the effort of staying calm, not allowing the Other to take control again. Drabheart's touch had forced it to retreat; like a rat bite to the paw, it caused a jolt of intense pain for the Other, making it leap backwards into the hidden crevices of her mind. It stayed there for now, watching Drabheart and the rest of Rainstripe's surroundings with a wary eye. It poked and prodded her mind, searching for yet another weakness that it could take advantage of, but there were none. In the assuaging glow of Drabheart's constant licking, a mental wall blocked the Other from reaching the rest of her.

She was so relieved that Drabheart was there for her, that someone cared enough about her to revive her, bring her back from the state she had been in not too long ago. Her body uncurled, the pressure that had shoved it into a ball dissipating as Drabheart led her into the world once again. She purred, though the sound was rough-edged and hoarse from the earlier screaming. Still, she didn't think Drabheart would mind, and she wanted to show her appreciation.

Like Frozenheart, Drabheart was her protector as well. She reacted the same way to his rescue, curling up next to him and resting her head on his back. Only then did her wandering eyes land on a large white figure standing in front of them. "Frozenheart? What are you doing?" Why was he all the way over there? Drabheart was helping to keep her sane, well, as sane as she could possibly be in this state. Why wasn't Frozenheart doing the same?

A terrible thought rampaged through her mind, stomped its way down to her stomach and tied it in knots. What if Frozenheart had had enough? What if he was tired of the Other taking over her mind, what if he wanted a friend that wasn't insane? At first she thought fear had driven him from her, but she couldn't smell the unmistakable scent of it, the fear-scent that covered the coats of terrified cats. Besides, his eyes were not wide with alarm, but somehow determined.

Not even noticing the paw movement, Rainstripe focused only on the distance that separated them. "I see," she meowed softly, though her heart was close to breaking. "If you want to leave, if you, if-" she couldn't finish her words and buried her face in Drabheart's fur, the Other prowling around the edges of her mind, seeing that a new opportunity was arising.

[Cloud]

He felt his heart melt with sympathy and compassion for his new friend, and vowed something to himself. Vowed that however much she might scare him at times, however bad it got, he would not leave her. "Rainstripe, I would never - oh," He said, noticing the white tom next to the wall out of the corner of his eye, just in time to see him make a strange gesture....a paw waved at a short height. Did it mean a rat, should they hunt prey? No, it was smaller than that...

A lizard? No, not that small. A kit, maybe? "A kit, Frozenheart?" He said, hoping he didn't misunderstand his friend, who seemed incapable of speech, though intelligent and perceptive. He had every other ability, as far as Drabheart could tell. Perhaps he was mute.

[Ten]

If he wanted to what? Frozenheart couldn't believe his eyes. The poor girl was so deluded that she thought pacing a few tail-lengths off meant he had given up on her. Drabheart was holding her up, so he gave her a little nuzzle and plopped himself down before her with a thud of permanence. If that distance was too much, then he would stay right here.

To Drabheart, he nodded. A kit, yes. They must bring her to one. He smiled, imagining how Rainstripe, the real Rainstripe, would treat the little thing -- wasn't that just what they wanted to bring out in her?

[duckyaisha]

Relief was the first emotion she felt when Frozenheart wandered over and sat down next to her. It flooded her mind, stifling the raging flames of anger, devastation, and betrayal. Much better to be feeling calm, though a little dizzy. She was so, so glad Frozenheart hadn't deserted her. In fact, she had been numb from the shock of his 'leaving' so her feelings were subdued. If he had indeed left her, she couldn't imagine the chaos that would occur, what she would do with her life. The Other would certainly seize the opportunity to gain control once again. With a shudder, she remembered once again the mauling of the rat. She had done that. The Other had been the driving force, but in the end it had been her claws, her teeth. A rolling sensation in her stomach made her feel nauseated; luckily she had Frozenheart to lean against until the feeling passed.

The Other was cursing its luck right now, she could feel it. When it had taken complete control of her, she had gained a new ability, one that tilted the balance a little more in her favor. Only slightly though, but still. Any advantage was better than nothing. By taking over her mind, the Other had exposed itself. Now, Rainstripe could tell what it was feeling more acutely. Before, its feelings had been hidden from her, fogged and opaque, unless they were strong. Unless the Other hid an emotion in the deep recesses of its mind, Rainstripe knew how it felt about something. And about this, it was frustrated. A triumphant smirk curled her lips, even over so small a victory.

Drabheart's words ensnared her attention much more effectively than Frozenheart's vague paw gestures. It was the best he could do, of course, but she was glad Drabheart was there to make things more obvious. Her mind wasn't exactly in top condition right now. A simple task such as deciphering Frozenheart's movements was more difficult when she was still recovering from the Other's succession of attacks. Every so often, an aftershock would hit her, a memory, a sound, an image, would flash into her mind and just as quickly vanish. They were no where near as painful as the actual seizing of her mind, but kept her focus off the other two cat each time one appeared.

A kit? Panic erupted through her relatively serene mind, widening her eyes, standing her fur on end, tensing her muscles so they were ready to move at the slightest command. No, no, no, this was wrong! A kit would just make things worse! She could feel it, she could feel the Other stalking around in the back of her mind, waiting, watching, keeping track of each and every movement. It was a hunter more successful than any cat in the enclosure, and it was terrifying. The instant a kit appeared here, it would make her kill the poor thing. She knew this for a fact. A slight pang of anger from the Other confirmed her suspicions- it wasn't happy that she had figured it out.

The taking of an innocent life- it would completely and utterly destroy her. Once her claws sank into the kit's flesh, tore into its vital organs, snapped its neck easily, her life was over. There was no way to come back from that. Killing the kit would mean she would have to kill herself to make up for it. The Other might not want her to, but she would do it. No cat that killed another, especially a kitten, should be allowed to live. And even if her suicide didn't work. she would still be effectively dead. The Other would take control of her mind forever, she and it would switch spots, and she would be banished from her own body forever. Afraid that her voice would show her fears, she simply shook her head vehemently, hoping they didn't force it on her.

[Ten]

Put out, Frozenheart drooped his head. None of his ideas ever worked, did they? Not knowing how to help her was so frustrating. He acknowledged that it was nothing compared to what she felt, but that was the point. Now what could they do? He reminded himself to stay put instead of pacing and looked to Drabheart, discouraged. It was heart-wrenching to think Rainstripe could be stuck like this for the rest of her life. What possibilities were left? Quarantine her from the rest of the enclosure?

[Cloud]

Drabheart, too, felt his own expression mirror Frozenheart's. He looked at the bigger tom in slight despair, but assumed a determined expression. Maybe they couldn't think of a perfect solution right now - and he so wished he could - but at least she had them.

They weren't much, admittedly - particularly him. But maybe they could at least help her control this vicious, alien thing. Tame it, until they figured out how to get rid of it. The irony was that although he wished he had more information about it, the only way he could do that was by having it in his head and not only was that impossible, it'd drive him insane. He almost laughed. How could he know true insanity? If anyone did, it was the poor gray tabby.

"We won't give up on you, Rainstripe. I think, that until we figure out to get rid of it for good, we should stay with you. What do you think, Frozenheart?" He looked at his friend anxiously, hoping he would agree.

[Ten]

Well of course they should stay with her. His nod was automatic and emphatic. How he could say no when Rainstripe had been so frightened to see him walking away?

But a question that was meant to remind himself of his reasons for staying also raised new doubts. The entire reason he opposed Clanhood was his aversion to being stuck in a corner with the feeble-bodied and feeble-minded. He liked to be able to go out and talk to whomever he pleased and come and go as he pleased. He had never wanted to be restricted to select company, and now he found himself imposing those restrictions on himself.

For a moment, Frozenheart's commitment wavered. Staying with Rainstripe until she could handle separation -- when or if that day might come -- would deprive him of meeting many new friends and interesting cats, and Rainstripe's neediness was beginning to drain him.

What's the matter with you? he growled at himself. These thoughts were selfish. It wasn't Rainstripe's fault she was in this predicament. Besides, a good cat would care more about being a true friend to the cats he already knew, rather than seeking out new ones like a slut seeks a sire for her kits.

So which one did he want to be? Frozenheart remained staunch on his position. He was a good cat. He had to stay. With that settled, he sprawled out on the dusty ground, deaf to the mewling cries of kits at the stream.

[duckyaisha]

Rainstripe felt a harsh pang of frustration, but not at her friends. They hadn't deserted, which was an accomplishment in itself. She knew how difficult it was to put up with a cat as mentally damaged as she was, and she knew that few cats would've even considered sticking with her this long. No, Rainstripe felt frustrated at herself, and the Other of course, but her negative feelings towards it were constant, they had been since she first got stuck with it, and this was something new. Every single time one of them came up with an idea or she came up with one herself, it was shot down.

Until every last trace of the Other was wiped from her mind, she would be a twisted, mutated version of the cat she once was. She would feel paranoid and unclean, and have to deal with inexplicable urges to murder and tear apart innocent creature, be they cat, rat, lizard, whatever. While it was essential that this problem be taken care of, she could easily see how the string of failures was putting strain on her friends. She was like a kit, helpless, needy, but without anyone to shoulder the burden but Frozenheart and Drabheart, two cats who never thought they'd be getting into anything like this when they first met her.

Some part of her needed power, longed to have power, if only a miniscule amount. After all, she didn't even have the last word in her own mind. She wanted to be able to change things for those two, to make their lives just a little bit easier, change something at least!. Something to show her thanks, to show that she knew how hard this was. But aside from food, which was temporary and was too superficial for what she was trying to do, there was nothing valuable here. Sand, rocks, sticks- what kind of life-changing show of appreciation could she create out of that?

Unless, it didn't have to be something they could touch and see. Maybe she could simply return the affection they'd always shown her. But that seemed awkward somehow, and what if the Other decided to unsheath its claws at the wrong moment? Before, when she'd done things like nuzzling or licking, it hadn't attacked, but it had been disturbingly quiet lately, as if it were plotting something. Think, what else could she do?

After only a second of thinking, an idea came to her, smashing into her mind like a clap of thunder in her ears. What about their names? Drabheart and Frozenheart had to be some of the most depressing names she'd ever heard, and they didn't match the cats at all. Would they go for that idea? Maybe not. Maybe they would end up thinking less of her if she suggested something as major as a name change. But they might think less of her if she did nothing, too.

Summoning all her courage, Rainstripe stood between the two toms, determination evident in her stance and eyes, though her legs trembled slightly.

"I have an idea. I was thinking, well, I don't think your names really match you. And isn't that the point of names? I mean, my name is Rainstripe because my stripes look like heavy rain, and Woodstripe was named so because she's brown like wood and has stripes. But I haven't seen anything yet that shows me that either one of you deserve the names you were given! Frozenheart, you are the kindest and most affectionate cat I have ever met, and nothing shows me you deserve to be named Frozen- anything! Yes, your fur is white, but you could easily have White, Ice, or Cloud as the first part of your name. Drabheart, there is nothing drab about you at all, and you don't deserve to be described as such. How come you two have just kept these name your entire lives? I think your names shouldn't be so derogatory towards you. I propose that you change them!"

[Ten]

ooc| /points something out. "...but you could easily have White, Ice, or Cloud as the first part of your name." -- They don't know about clouds, remember? It's okay; we can pretend she didn't say that one.

bic|

Frozenheart tilted his head. They had been talking about fighting the Other, and all of a sudden Rainstripe was in a fit about names. What did this have to do with...? But maybe that was the point. Maybe she didn't want to think about it anymore. This worried him, as it was still a pressing issue, but he too would be glad for a moment's reprieve with a lighter subject.

He swept his blue eyes over Drabheart. The tabby had grayish-brown fur, just like the color drab, but the word did have implications of shabbiness. Frozenheart didn't have any substitute ideas, though.

As for himself, he didn't see anything derogatory about a comparison between his fur and a frozen object. He shrugged. That's what he looked like. If Rainstripe made a different name for him, however, he wouldn't mind. He'd already been nicknamed Whitey. Appreciating her offer, the big tom rubbed her again with a smile--she could call him whatever she wanted.

[Cloud]

He was truly...shocked. Not in a bad way, just rather surprised. But then, maybe having this crazy thing in her head made her mind go in weird directions. Immediately after he had this thought, he grimaced in shame. It was wrong of him to even entertain thoughts like that. Plain wrong. Even if she was a little crazy, he must not allow himself to make judgments and look down on her because of it.

His answer poured out of his mouth, he realized he was rambling. However, he didn't much care.

"Uh, well...I, uh, never really thought about it, I guess....my name was just my name and that was that..." The day he had received his name was far more memorable than the name itself.

A big, gray tom with pain and dislike in his eyes, but tenderness in his voice. The last tenderness, or even words, that Drabheart would ever hear from his father. He had often wondered if his mother would've been different from the hard tom, if he'd known her. It was something he had brooded on often, especially after learning he had a half sister with the same mother. It was a strange feeling, to know there was another cat who'd known a cat he'd so badly wanted to know, yet he could barely speak to her. He wanted to - but it was so awkward.

What a failure he was, if he couldn't even reach out to his elderly sibling. What a mess. He hung his head. Maybe he deserved his name. But then, Rainstripe could call him Sticktail if she wanted - he didn't care. The most important thing right now was to keep her happy - and hopefully sane as well.

"But really, I wouldn't mind having a different one. Uh....I can't think of any at the moment now, though." He finished lamely, making an apologetic face.

Brownheart? Mudheart? Treeheart? None sounded right. Off though his name might be, at least it fitted him. But then, he was content to let the gray tabby do whatever she wished.